Ahhh, the roid rage.
If the most recent episode of The Bachelorette can teach the youth of America anything, it's a young man can act like a complete jerk behind the back of his love interest and retain her attraction.
But that's jumping ahead, let's start at the beginning. Last week, on the most recent episode of The Bachelorette before tonight, we learned to not fake taking a shot and "the bubble" a la 30 Rock* really exists. We also learned it doesn't take much to get on this show, all you have to do is be a complete ham.
Adonis himself, Chris Harrison, shows up the tell the men about their next dates and lucky Big Boy Ed gets the little lady all to himself. Jillian is so excited about the great surprise she has for Big Eddy. It always peeves me when the Bachelorette or Bachelor claim to have planned the date. Why do they insist on acting like they even know more than 3o minutes before the show the date they are going on?
After a helicopter tour and zip-lining, Big Eddy and Jillian get to know each other in the pool. Nothing better than a little liquid canoodling. I have seen enough of the late night dinner on top of the building dates to feel a little skeptical of the future of these two. Not enough spark for my tastes. Maybe I'm just sick of the whole "I never open up to anyone" spiel. It's just a coy ploy. It works though because Big Eddy gets a rose boutonniere and gets the stay in the Big Boy Mansion.
Too many of the boys to mention get invited to a Hollywood set to film some Western scenes. hopefully, none of these guys went on the show to be famous because their acting was a bit contrived. Not like all the acting they pull when they are around Jillian.
Another downtown LA location. Interesting they never show the surrounding areas because that might ruin the magic. A couple of skeeze moves and a pool scene later, Bobby the Bartender receives a rose. Goes to show, pick a girl up and swing her around and you capture a little bit of her heart.
Sascha the Oil Baron gets a one on one date that doesn't go so well. After sharing his intensely emotional story about his car accident, Jillian decides that because he has never had his heart broken, he won't be able to fall in love. No, he hasn't had his heart broken but his pelvis broke in ten places. That seems like enough pain. Funny, last week Kiptyn said the same thing and Jillian kept him around. Maybe she just didn't want to make out with Sascha enough.
The Juan and Dave Drama Meltdown seems to have been brought on by a combination of steroid overuse and Casanova Syndrome. Dave needs to calm down and stop twitching his eye and Juan needs to back down from the cheesy comments. I guess Dave was right when he called Juan a cheese ass.
Long story, short, no surprises at the rose ceremony except maybe Dave but some girls are attracted to the Alpha Male. It goes back to the days when loinclothes were acceptable on days other that Halloween and women needed a strong man to protect them from the sabertooth tigers and wooly mammoths.
Next week looks promising. Some of these guys probably have girlfriends. Let the accusations fly!
*"The Bubble" is an excellent episode of the most awesome show, 30 Rock. Jon Hamm guests stars as Liz Lemon's love interest who lives in complete ignorance that his extreme attractiveness let him get away with things people of average appearance can't.
The bubble is one of my fave episodes. "This racket's a fart and your...." well you know the rest
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